Parenting means different things to different people, I know this to be true, but I feel that these are some pretty common scenarios for most of us out there!
What happened when you became a parent that really made you feel like you had crossed the great divide between those who are and those who aren’t?
So without further ado, you know you’re a parent when…
1.)…You start using your breasts for their intended purpose (breastfeeding). Or, for men, when you support your wife breastfeeding. There is a BIG difference between wanting to breastfeed and actually doing it! The first couple weeks (ahem…months) were a heck of a learning curve. I’m so glad to be out of the “new parent” woods in this respect.
2.)…You can’t open the collapsed stroller. I have never, in my entire life, felt more like an idiot than in the first couple weeks of using Logan’s stroller. I had a devil of a time getting it open. I cursed this technology that was supposed to be so helpful for new parents and was actually a pain. I’m not sure if it was sleep deprivation or what, but I hated that stroller. Just another reason I love babywearing!
3.)…You can’t figure out how to click the freakin’ carseat into place! You think you’ve done it right only to hear the carseat “click” into place a few minutes later.
4.)…You have to learn how to change a poopy diaper while a baby screams & flails. This may be one of the hardest parenting skills to master. Even now, on my dark days, Logan’s hand & foot (and leg) will land in the poop. I feel so defeated and exhausted when it happens.
5.) …You’re fascinated and horrified by “the soft spot.” Plus, there’s the moment you realize it pulsates. So very weird.
6.) …You experience more anxiety in an hour than you experienced in your whole prechildren life combined!
7.)…You realize that your days of staying up and partying can’t even begin to touch the exhaustion of being a new parent. Seriously, if you don’t have children, you have never been this tired.
8.)…It occurs to you that you have never loved anyone as much as you love your tiny human.
9.)…You try to clip baby nails for the first time and realize it’s a two man job and even then it’s a terrifying challenge! I’m amazed more babies don’t lose the tips of their fingers.
10.)…You have to give them their bath BEFORE the cord falls off and for some reason the sponge bath seems to infuriate them.
11.)…Picking out an outfit comes down to what will hold up under any conditions.
12.)…See #11 and add that packing a diaper bag comes down to having everything that you might ever need under any circumstances ever. In the world. In another dimension. In the rain. On a plane. In the dark. In water. You get my point. Be prepared!
13.)…You have to care for the umbilical cord stump and it kind of freaks you out. But not as much as when it falls off, gets stuck to your shirt, and you can’t figure out when it happened.
14.)…You have to watch your new baby get shots and do the heel blood test and realize it’s such an agonizing feeling to see them in any kind of discomfort. And then when you look at your husband and you’re positive he’s considering punching the nurse in the face.
15.)…You find yourself discussing poop more than ever before. The color, the consistency, you name it, we’ve talked about it.
16.)…Your concept of sleep completely changes! Forever.